Tristan Taormino’s Ultimate Guide to Anal Sex for Women is a must have for every woman even semi-interested in anal play. Tristan’s Guide is all-inclusive and if you’re a beginner, everything you ever want to know will be on one of the 220 pages in this book.
Tristan’s book is broken up into nineteen different chapters covering everything from inserting a finger to anal fisting. It starts out with a chapter devoted to the 12 myths about anal sex. This is a perfect introduction because it dispels any misconceptions you may have about anal before it even starts laying the groundwork for anal play. The second edition of this book is updated with new information, new advice and a column called Ask the Anal Advisor where Tristan answers actual reader questions, so even if you have the first edition, getting the second would be a good investment.
Tristan starts by telling the reader how much she enjoys anal sex and thinks that all women have that capacity if they take their time and are well informed about their own anal anatomy and the reactions of the body. One of the first things Tristan addresses, in the myths section and in almost every section throughout the book, is that anal sex should not hurt. Not even one little bit. This is a point that cannot be said enough as most people who want to try anal are worried about pain. Tristan points out time and again that if it hurts, you’re doing something wrong and your body is telling you to stop it.
There is a section devoted completely to preparation and hygiene, which is great for those of us that are scared to try anal due to the possibility of encountering feces. One thing Tristan mentions is – get over the feces issue, it’s just part of you and if you run into it, clean off and continue – it makes the average person feel much better to know that even pros and porn stars encounter feces in their anal adventures. This and other aspects of Tristan’s book make it seem like she’s a good friend giving you advice rather than an author you’ve never met. She is constantly reminding you that she too is human and experiences the same things we all do.
One of the most important chapters in the book is entitled Beyond Our Bodies. This chapter goes over emotional issues with anal, trusting and communicating with your partner and covers things like fear, fantasies and power issues. Since half of anal is emotional and mental, this chapter is a must-have addition to any book on anal sex.
Some chapters are devoted to sex toy materials and find the perfect anal probe, butt plug or strap-on to start or continue your anal pleasure. She also talks about lubricants and stresses the importance of a good, thick lubricant because unlike the vagina, the ass doesn’t have any means of self-lubrication. She makes a few specific brand recommendations such as Astroglide gel and Maximus.
The positions chapter is great. It probably doesn’t have any positions you couldn’t figure out on your own, but what it does have is information about where pressure is applied in each position and why some might be painful for people with certain anal anatomy. It adds tips and positive aspects about each position by the illustration. When I work my way up to full anal sex with my partner, we’ll definitely be looking at this chapter for advice.
There are also really interesting chapters on anal fisting, enemas, butt bondage, anal health and safer sex. All in all, this is definitely worth the read and I would recommend it to absolutely anyone interested in anal pleasure.